I bought one of these fancy electronic doorbells that shows you a picture of whoever is at the door – and it does not matter where you are. You can be basking in the sun in Florida and it will show you on your iPhone who is at your door. There are also ringers you can place throughout the house – and you can hook it up to the cloud so it records everything.
For example you can have a slow motion video of the postman delivering your mail – or of someone making off with your door mat.
At least it says on the website that it does all this but I tried for months and could not get it to function properly. See it all depends on your WiFi and I could just not get mine fired up enough to do what it was supposed to do.
So I finally gave up and reinstalled a doorbell and a new ringer out front. Cate says the new ringer is hideous. I think this is unfair because I spent quite a bit of time picking it out. Well actually it was the only one Lowes had – so I bought it – and it cost me $12.95.
But I have given her details of the best door bell website in the known universe and she can browse this and pick one she really likes.
The reason I started all this was the that old chimes – as distinct from the actually door bell – did not actually chime properly. They sort of made a bit of a clunk-clunk noise.
So today Gustavo installed a new one. This one goes ding-dong – but so quietly that unless you are standing next to it you will not hear it. Javier is going to find a better one for me.
I could have done this but it involves being up a ladder and this is verboten in our house.
Gustavo also installed the new smoke alarms and in between doing this and drinking my coffee – which he loves - he told me about recent events in his life.
He found out just before Christmas that his girl friend was having an affair with someone else – but that was OK because he was not that fond of her – and then on Christmas eve he totaled his truck when it slipped on a patch of ice. But that’s OK because it was 14 years old and he wanted a new one.
But he found a new girl and they spent Christmas together but then she had to rush off because she was having an affair with a married man and she got a text telling her that he was available – albeit briefly.
And on New Year’s Eve he took a girl out to dinner and she got absolutely plastered and vomited in his new truck.
None of this concerns him because he seems to have no trouble picking up women and he showed me some of the photos of his recent ones.
Now based on the photos of them that I saw – and what I see of Gustavo– he clearly has some form of animal magnetism.
He personally admits to be short and flabby – and not particularly good looking - but says he is going to the gym to lose weight and build muscles – and also pick up women.
He says he wants to look better so that the can pick up not just women - but really hot women. And he has his eye on some at the gym.