We never get bored in Vienna

Cate is back home at last and doesn’t leave again until – oh – tomorrow morning when she goes to Shanghai.

She will be gone for a week this time and then after a little while at home we get to go to Cyprus together.

I told you that I wanted to get a map of Cyprus for my Garmin car navigation system but baulked at the cost. Well – after giving it serious consideration I decided that it was something we should have.

The problem is that when we travel - Cate always drives – and this means that I am in charge of navigation. I am very bad indeed at this and am so bad at reading maps that I may as well take a cup with tea leaves.

The terrifying prospect of me trying to read maps while Cate shouts ‘which way?’ at me while she hammers along at full tilt finally convinced me that it was a worthwhile investment.

It will be more relaxing for all of us.

There has been quite a bit happening in Austria during the last week so I thought I should give you some highlights from the Austrian Independent:

A man fell into a ravine while having a pee. The most interesting thing about this is that it took 28 rescuers to get him out. 28! Who counted them?

A woman bit a two year old child after a road rage incident. I simply cannot imagine this scene – but the Austrian Independent has thoughtfully provided me with a picture of some teeth so I can start the process.   

A man was killed by a toilet roll while riding his bike. This demonstrates that you should never cycle while carrying toilet rolls -  (I never shall) or should wear a bike helmet. This continues the long tradition of Austrians finding new and exciting ways to shuffle off the mortal coil.

This is just in one week. No wonder we never get bored in Vienna. 

She will never miss them

Belvedere and 4 Ducks 29 May 2012

Well Cate has finally escaped from India and is now in Dubai where she says she has a suite at the Mövenpick hotel. I think having a suite means that she has a table and chairs as well as a bed.

But maybe not. Because she travels so much she often gets upgrades to pretty special rooms.

She says that the Mövenpick is not as nice as Raffles where we stayed – but she is there strictly on business this time so can’t expect too much.

I have been spending some time in the basement trying to organise the shemozzle down there and throwing away a few things. I can’t tell you what these are because Cate will immediately decide that she cannot live without them.

However, if I never tell you what they are I guarantee she will never miss them.

OK I will tell you a couple of things. There was an old rug and a couple of old pillows.

I noticed that the Reindeer Rug is still lurking down there. I wonder if we should give it another run upstairs. Probably not – Mrs Moneypenny may have a nervous collapse.  

I just know is busting to shed all over Vienna again.

We cannot hear the barking

Lenny

I am fortunate that the incessantly barking dog in the next door apartment cannot be heard from our apartment. We have big thick doors and walls and almost no sound penetrates.

But every time I leave the apartment – or come back – I can hear it yapping.

Bandit

Now I have nothing against small dogs.  I don’t know why God made them so noisy but I am sure there is a reason – just as I am sure there is a desperate need for Irukandji jellyfish - although it’s hard to see what that could be.

But small dogs I cannot hear do not bother me much. Although I do wonder whether or not my neighbours are deaf. Or is it that after a while they no longer hear the yapping and it just becomes background noise.

I could ask my son Lenny who has two small dogs – but I am sure they are very well behaved. Although the crazy one (also named Lenny) was not present last time I visited. He goes ape any time there are visitors and tries to tear their clothes off and urinate on them. I think he is a Republican.

In Sydney we had – for a time -  the neighbours from hell. They bought the house next door and renovated it from top to bottom. But he ran a building company so they only worked on the house sporadically – when his business was slow.

This mean that a job that could have taken three months took eighteen and we all nearly went stark staring mad in the process.

There would be a lull for a few weeks and then the hammering and sawing and yelling and loud music playing would start up again at dawn. This would go on for a few days and they would go away – possibly for a week – possibly for a month.

Muffin in fact did go mad and licked all the fur off her abdomen and sides. It took her a long time to get furry again and she never recovered fully.

Anyway they had two small dogs who they kept inside while the building work was going on but once it was finished they let them out of the house and they would have barking competitions for about 22 hours per day.

They also sat in their back garden and smoked incessantly (the people not the dogs). Apparently they did not smoke in their house so as not to offend themselves. The smoking and the dogs effectively destroyed our outdoor life and we retreated to our lounge room and then came to Vienna.

Now we only have to worry about the people who take their dogs out each day to defecate on the pavement.