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Saturday, November 29, 2014

Weight loss is guaranteed

Well it did not snow here and snowed only a tiny bit in Washington but United was not satisfied with this so on the way to Washington delayed our flight four times and it left four hours late.

The icing on the cake was standing next to the plane in the freezing cold waiting for our bags. They are carry on bags but on small planes you have to surrender them just before you get on the plane and reclaim then when it lands.

But the trip home was doddle – and on both legs we were upgraded to first class. This does not mean much but it meant I could sit at the front of the plane and have lime in my soda.

The crazy TSA approved system was in full cry and on the way there I was approved and Cate was not. Being approved means that you do not have to take your shoes and belt off.

On the way home Cate was TSA approved and I was not. Stuff like this no longer surprises or bothers us.

We had an excellent time in Washington and ate lots of Turkey. I also drank wine for the first time in about seven weeks and managed not to fall over.

Last week I weighed myself for the first time since before I went into hospital. I had lost 10 pounds. I am writing a book ‘Brain surgery weight loss tricks’. It is a scary and expensive way to do it – but weight loss is guaranteed.



Tuesday, November 25, 2014

I can numb myself

Edwards diner in Indy
So there is nothing unusual in the basement. I have checked it thoroughly and there are no people, ghosts or anything unusual down there. I don’t know what the fuss was about. 

I did note that we are down to our last 48 rolls of toilet paper so I will need to visit Costco very soon. Some of our seven bathrooms have only six spare rolls in them.

Cate is still doing the kitty litter and I will take this over today. I admire her stamina for doing this for so long. Sissi is still occasionally doing strange things in weird places so we have hissy tins placed all over the house. This does the job very nicely.

Tomorrow we are going to Virginia to have Thanksgiving with Cate’s brother and sister-in-law. This will be good fun. Last year we drove and then went on down to Charleston – and encountered ghastly weather on the way there and on the way back.

Tomorrow also I have my last shot of antibiotics and the nurse is coming to take out my PICC line. I will at last be able to have a proper shower and wash my left arm.


This year we are flying. This is always fun in America and it will be made more interesting by the expected four foot dump of snow on Washington on Wednesday. This means that we will either get there late or not at all. However I will be able to drink so can numb myself to the indignities of air travel if I need to.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Maybe next year

The dawn of the doughnut
Only one day to Basement Day. I just know there is nothing unusual down there but I will need to check all my bulk supplies of the stuff I buy from Costco. That store never ceases to amaze me.

I will also be allowed to drive under supervision and am looking forward to the day when I can start doing the kitty litter again. Cate has been doing this since 9 October and this really is a heroic performance. Of course she does wear a surgical mask and Ugg boots - but even so.

I have decided after Buffalo that we need to store more food in the basement because I just know that at some stage we will be buried here and will not be able to get out of the house for days. The weather in the mid west – and indeed in most places – seems to be just crazy. I have supplies of Saos and Vegemite but probably need some kangaroo tail soup and pickled koala ears for emergency use.

The colts are playing on Sunday – but they are playing like headless chooks and I have no hopes for them at all now. Maybe next year.


Thursday, November 20, 2014

Only €5 per bad man

Last nite I was allowed to drive. We went to dinner at Black Market in Massachusetts avenue and Cate had two glasses of wine so I drove home. I accomplished this without incident and as a reward Cate let me take the trash, recycling and compost stuff out this morning.

I am also allowed to walk to Shoefly for lunch and take Cate’s dry cleaning into Sparkle cleaners opposite. Walking of course – I am still in training.

Tonite I am making Three Bad Men pasta. This is my own concoction and I was inventing it one nite in Vienna when a woman knocked on the door and said she needed €15 because three bad men were chasing her. She said her mother would bring it back in half an hour.

Well of course I gave it to her – it was only €5 per bad man – and surprisingly her mother never turned up.

It was a bit weird because we were on the top floor in what was supposed to be a secure building. Well it probably would have been except there was a massage parlor on the first floor in our part of the building and an extraordinary number of men with bad backs visited this every day.

The proprietor was Miss Sue – who was Chinese – as were all the masseuses - and we exchanged greetings quite often. She was four feet high and four feet wide but was very pretty and pleasant.

I know so much about this because I walked by it a couple of times each day on the way to and from our apartment.

Anyway – I called my invention Three Bad Men pasta. It has red onion, bell peppers, cherry tomatoes halved, lots of chopped salami and pepperoni and some cilantro – cooked and then as garnish. This is all mixed with penne. I have been known to throw other things in there and sometimes top it with parmesan cheese.


Wednesday, November 19, 2014

It's all about bacon


Lenny and I have been corresponding about bacon – which seems to be a national obsession in America. In Australia you can buy bacon. Here you can buy about a million different types of bacon of all types and sizes and colors and flavors.

Lenny sent me an article from Bacon Today. I though he was winding me up but it appears there really is a site of that name which focuses on all things bacon.

There are many fascinating things on this site. I am particularly taken with the bacon latte – but the prize taker is the bacon alarm clock found by Lenny. What genius thought of this?  A modern day Leonardo da Vinci lives with us.

There are so many fascinating things happening in Washington they keep me riveted to the TV. I just cannot wait to see what happens next. It is a bit like Game of Thrones except everyone is plotting to NOT make things happen. Happily I have been able to distance myself from the almighty train wreck which is taking place.

In the real world I have heated things up for dinner for the last few days and am about to start cooking again. I have found recipes for the “world’s best lasagna” and the “best meatballs” I have never made either of these things and am looking forward to messing about in the kitchen again.

And I just updated my Mac with Yosemite. I can now not find anything but will conduct a diligent search for the things I really need. I know they are there somewhere.

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

We are not worried

I am thankful to my son Lenny for providing me with details of the ‘Durkey’. This satisfies the need for the Thanksgiving turkey – and the lust for hot dogs.  I told him all it needed was bacon.

I won’t need to do it this year because we are going to visit Cate’s brother in Virginia. I spoke to my infectious diseases doctor and he said I can finish the yellow gunk on the day before Thanksgiving – which is when we fly out.

I can at last get the PICC removed from my arm and have a proper shower.

And – I will be allowed to have a drink for the first time since 8 October. I will do this in a prone position because I imagine I will lapse into unconsciousness after one glass of Pouilly-FuissĂ©.

It has snowed  bit and the last few days we have been ball tearers as far as coldness is concerned. The low today is 8° which is 30° below average. Monika spends most of her time perched on the heating vents – and I do put the fire on for her at night.

The big news here is that Cate is going to let me drive on the weekend AND go down to the basement – supervised of course.

I am not allowed out today because the paths are too icy and I may fall and kill myself. This would be  a great shame after the enormous amount of money spent to save my life – and particularly for those whose bills I have not yet paid.


I met Beanie man and dog. He is Robbie and his dog is Frannie. She is a gorgeous little puppy who did blot her copybook by biting Cate – unintentionally of course – but she did bleed a lot. Robbie says Frannie has hade her rabies shots so we are not worried.