Friday, September 18, 2015

No one else even came close

Cate’s brother and sister in law are coming from Washington for the weekend. The planning for this is akin to the landings in Europe on D Day.

By the way – if you have ever wondered what the D in D Day stands for - it stands for Day.

First of all there is cleaning. Everything must be very clean so I have spent the last few days vacuuming, dusting and polishing. Yes I have polished the toaster and the microwave and I have cleaned the inside of the washing machine.

Then there is the food. I have acquired enough food to feed the Queen’s Royal Hussars – and their horses – for a month. But it is not just the quantity of food – it is also the type.

On these occasions Cate just loves to make something really nice for a starter. (I do the main course).

She scours cookbooks and always finds something completely delicious – and which will require substances of which I – and the people at the supermarket - have never heard. 

These will include things like frosted lark’s tongues, free range smoked eel ears,  Patagonian high mountain snow corn and Venezuelan beaver cheese. 

After much diligent searching I will find these things – or the next best thing. I will find that I can in fact buy smoked eel ears but only in a 20 pound bag. Cate will only use two ears so the remaining 19.9 pounds will be stuffed into a cupboard and there they shall remain until they turn to dust.

Our cupboards are full of these types of these things. I noticed yesterday that our downstairs fridge contains a bag of about 10 pounds of cranberries. What are these doing here? I wondered and then remembered that we needed about 2 ounces of cranberries last Christmas – but I had to buy a 10 pound bag. I found some obscure spices a few months ago that had a use by date of 1995.

We have bought three dozen bottles of wine. If this is not enough I have a cellar downstairs with another five dozen.

The florist will arrive this afternoon with a truck full of flowers. Then of course there is the jumping castle and the balloons.

Some really churlish people made a list of all the lies the Republican candidates told during the debate. Carly was the winner and Donald Trump came second.

No one else even came close.


  1. Oh! So in this Day Day scenario you are the Germans. Have you laid the mines, strung the barbed wire, bought enough ammo and distributed your tanks properly?

    1. You are 1/3 of the way to rewriting the Twelve Days of Christmas song lyrics with your 4 eXotics.

  2. Personally, I do not think you have enough wine.

  3. esb: Yes and I even had Georgia groomed so that she smells like a flower.

    fmc: Well we just made it.