The superior litter is made out of mulched owls

Our Billy (Photo by the two Es)

I have been silent on the ducks for a while so the therapy is apparently working. However I do see them every day and can report that they are well. Yesterday two of them were trying to peck each other to death but I put a stop to that by shouting at them along the lines that didn’t they have enough to worry about with the cold and not having knees that they should try to kill each other as well.

There was a man there who looked at me strangely but as he was busy breaking the ice with a stick it did not bother me too much.

I bought an ice scraper, a first aid kit and some vests from OAMTC so that we are prepared for our trip to Bad Ischl. If you have an accident here you cannot get out of your car unless you are wearing a vest (Warnweste). (This does not apply if you are dead).

The theory is that you will be more visible wearing these brightly coloured vests and will not be run over by another motorist. I bet!

We don’t have a spare tire – at all. There is a space for one of those tiny little play wheels that they use these days – but there is no tire in there. Helmut Bangflanger from Wiesenthal – who sold us the car – says that they don’t supply tires any more but that all you have to do is to call Mercedes or OAMTC and someone will come and fix your tire for you. I bet!

There is apparently a pressure pack of stuff that you can use to pump up a flat tire. This is very carefully concealed underneath the space where the tiny little play wheel would be if there was one. Helmut says it is difficult to get out but that in a emergency you just tear the cover off and dig it out. I think we probably need to carry an axe for this purpose – or call the fire brigade.

I went to the our favourite Blumen in the Wollzeile to buy some more Katzengrass but it had apparently burnt down over Christmas. This is unfortunate because the Blumen on our street says that they do not have Katzengrass and cannot get any. I find this very strange but have accepted it at face value – why would they lie? Perhaps it is my accent and they thought I had asked for Apfelstrudel.

So I will have to go further afield and will try the Blumen in markets in Landstrasser-Hauptstrasse.

In the meantime I have coloured some paper strips green and hung them on the remains of the Katzengrass plant. Muffin is quite content with these and they will do the job until I can ship in the right stuff.

Cate has told me that Rozalin has suggested that I am not using kitty litter of an appropriately high standard. My protests that I get the most expensive stuff that money can buy brought the retort ‘Yes – but at Billa’.

(i.e. you are such a bad and careless cat minder that you insult your cat by buying inferior litter at a supermarket. No wonder ICO will have nothing to do with you).

Apparently there is much better stuff and it can be acquired from a pet shop (where they don’t sell pets – just the stuff they need – if you want a cat here you contact an Insane Cat Owner).

The superior litter is made out of mulched owls and has flakes of gold. Each pellet has been hand carved by artisans in Bregenz and has the Hapsburgs family shield engraved on it.

Tomorrow I will have to drag my sorry ass down there to have a look. I will take my money with me.