Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Cate doesn't like Cod intestines

We saw some famous people a few nights ago. We were walking past the Sacher hotel after having dinner and some famous people came out and got into a black Mercedes Benz. We assume they were famous because there were people watching them and there were photographers taking their pictures.

To us of course they were just people – and this would have disturbed them enormously. The problem with being famous is that you are only famous to people who know who you are.

In Vienna – WE are the most famous people we know. I mean – we live in a fabulous penthouse overlooking Wien - drive a Mercedes with writing on its sides and wear Calvin Klein jeans – how hot is that!

This time in Korea they made Cate eat Cod intestines. She says they were worse than live octopus – I believe her. She also had Fugu and I told her that if her fingers started to tingle it was a sign that she had been poisoned and would die - but there was nothing she could do about it.
Of course as soon as I said this her fingers started to tingle and she spent the night waiting to die in an aeroplane on the way back to Wien. During this time she sent the cats a goodbye postcard and wrote a long letter of apology to John Howard and George Bush for the appalling things she has said about them during the last few years.

Nadia Poponova last week said that her friend’s cat was very old and had just died. ‘How old?’ I enquired. ‘14’ she said. Muffin is 16 and Bill is 15 so I am glad that they did not overhear this particular conversation.

We took the Mercedes for a gallop and it is indeed a thoroughbred! It is not as powerful as the Queen Mary (it doesn’t have to be – it doesn’t weigh 60 tonnes) but is agile, responsive and – importantly – automatic. This is bliss! We have named him Benny.

It is covered in advertising for the people who took my order under false pretences - oh so very long ago. So I am driving a car with a gigantic ‘Wiesenthal’ sign down each side and on the back window.

We went to Shopping City Sud to by a rug, a coat rack and Christmas tree decorations. We got all of these. Cate says that coat rack we bought is ‘hideous’. Imagine what she thought of the ones we didn’t buy!

Muffin loves the new rug and is trying to tear it to pieces. However it is made out of a mix of Cod intestines and titanium so it will take her months. In the meantime she has started leaving lumps of meat on it in the hope that they will leave marks. It is not really very furry so she may not vomit on it – although it is next to the Katzengrass so she doesn't have far to go if the mood take her.


  1. I had to cover Max's ears in the kitchen this morning when discussing your recent post with Emma. We celebrated Max's 18th on the weekend, complete with speeches, a cat-shaped pinata and a yard glass. He is still hung-over, which is not surprising given that he is 152 in cat years or thereabouts.

  2. Given that Max is being looked after by two of the best people on the planet he should live to be 200.