Thursday, October 9, 2008

Who would eat a chicken's ass?

Thanks to Anna Possum for her lovely letter and the pics. God bless her! I could be on Mars for all the messages I get from back home. I have 4 blog followers - 1 cat, 1 dog and (potentially) 2 people. Apart from Quolly - who is of course as mad as a cut snake - I get no emails from anyone.

I am having all sorts of computer problems. I bought a new PC six months ago and it has two hard drives each of 500 Gb (that’s a Terabyte) and 4 Gigs of RAM. It also has fire wire, Bluetooth and every other thing – but as I was on cable broadband in Sydney it does not have a wireless card – and here I have wireless.

So I have bought a USB Wireless Adaptor which is now fighting tooth and nail with every other piece of hardware and software in my PC. The end result is that I have a very long blue cable running from the modem in the lounge room to my office upstairs. Herr Birdstirrer from UPC has visited me on a couple of occasions but we have not been able to resolve the problem. I am spending a lot of time installing and uninstalling software and I imagine that this will go on for some time.

With the thought in mind that we could not make holes in the walls I bought lots of sticky wall hangers that can be removed without trace. I bought a whole bunch in Sydney and another pile in Bauhaus last week. I suspected that they could not be used on painted walls and proved this today. I did a test run with a kitchen wall clock attached to a painted wall. No matter how much you vacuum up itty bitty pieces of glass you always miss a bit that you find later when you are in bare feet. Sometimes they hide and don’t turn up until weeks later. I think we are going to have to use normal picture hangers and make good the walls before we leave. I will get a plasterer to fix the hole in the wall where the clock was hanging.

I went to Mariahilferstrasse today to go to Saturn which sells electrical and electronic goods. The U-Bahn is a truly excellent system – as good as the Metro in Paris and we have a station within two minutes walk. I can negotiate the U-Bahn because there are big maps in the stations and in the trains. It's when I get off the train that I have problems. I truly have no sense of direction and cannot even read a street directory. If I had been with Burke and Wills they would have perished before reaching Parramatta.

My trip to Saturn was – as expected – a total failure. Bags for a Wertheim Vacuum cleaner? Don’t sell that brand. A telephone with 4 handsets – possible but I couldn’t find anyone to help me. Electrical adaptors so that I can use Australian appliances in Wien – they had them but they are the size of bricks and are designed to be used in every country in the world including Burkina Faso.

Why 4 handsets? Because I am sure that Cate is going to keep giving our number to people and we only have one telephone outlet – at the UPC box - and every other phone has to be connected wirelessly. We need one in the lounge room – one in the bedroom and one in each study.

Yesterday I went to the Billa gourmet store in Ringstrassen Galerien and bought what I though were chicken breasts – I knew they were chicken something. On closer inspection at home they turned out to be another part of the chicken entirely – and I am still not sure what. There was a lot of bone and very little meat. Who would buy this? (apart from me of course). It may well have been the chicken’s ass. Who would eat chicken asses?

Hey bro – I had some great chicken asses last night – absolutely dee-licious
Do you like those chicken asses bro?
Love em –– all bone and no meat - can’t get enough – sometimes if they run out of asses I buy whole chickens and throw away everything except the ass
Well perhaps they should grow chickens with just asses for ass aficionados like you?
That’s a silly idea bro – how would they eat?

1 comment:

  1. Ok Phillip,
    Every morning reading your blog bring a smile (sorry,but it reads funny maybe because I can understand?!?!). Good luck the the wireless thing! We had to have Hubbies IT guy come fix ours.