Tuesday, September 4, 2012

More rules

Gwenyth discovered another unwritten rule when she went to breakfast early. We were told that breakfast was at 8:00 and when she arrived at 7:45 she asked if she could have some Muesli.

‘We wait’ said Captain Mart and indeed the other passengers – six Germans – obviously knew the rules as they arrived early but stood around until precisely 8:00 when they sat down and started eating.

It was – as they say – a ‘European breakfast’. This consists mainly  of bread, cheese and cold meat. There was no evidence of the advertised toast. Despite living in Europe I have never been able to do a European breakfast so usually had a slice of bread or – if there was one – a bread roll.

There was usually an added delicacy. On day 1 it was a boiled egg (one each) and on another day we were each given two very small, very hard and very cold croissants.

The coffee was the worst I have ever tasted – and that is a big call. It was made in a very large pot and was possibly allowed to boil overnight.

There was an Espresso machine which we discovered was for the use of Captain Mart and Miss Elly -  but was also used to make one small cup each (and one only) for the passengers when they had afternoon tea after cycling.

PK broke a rule by asking for a beer for afternoon tea but was rebuffed. Beer time is apparently after dinner.

The boat was advertised as air conditioned – and indeed it was – in the sense that there was an air conditioning system fitted with controls in each cabin.

We tried to use this one night but after we had fallen asleep Captain Mart banged on our door – burst in and turned it off – shouting ‘you have your heating on!’ We did not try that again.

By far our worst transgression was that PK and I broken a written rule and brought alcohol on board. Well we could hardly go anywhere without Jameson Whiskey.

We each had a small glass on Jammies on deck and were sprung by Captain Mart who gave us a severe talking to and went on with some fatuous crap about how the customs people knew about every drink he had on board and he would be fined if they found anything else.

Actually he just wanted us to drink the burnt horse piss that he called alcohol and which he sold at exorbitant prices. And we did – to a point – but PK and I usually retired to our cabins for a nightcap of Jammies.

There is much more – but to go on about it would be to labour the point.

Notwithstanding the boat we had a wonderful time – except that Gwenyth fell off her bike on day 2 – went down like a sack of potatoes - and could not cycle again. More of that later.


  1. I bet you already signed a movie deal, didn't you? *duck&run*

  2. All this posts lacks is pictures!

    I think I may have unpleasant dreams about Captain Mark after reading all the comments in the one forum you linked.

  3. Merisi: I have to do it incognito so Captain Mart does not find me.

    Wanderlust: I think they would be nightmares.

  4. Oh, I almost missed this blog post. I work from the list on my own web page, so I guess you published two close together during the time period that I was either asleep or off on my business trips/errands downtown. It is a shame when someone wants to dictate the alcohol consumption rules of another adult. Sad. I just try to look at these type of episodes for their entertainment value. Hope this is ledgible, as I am dwinkin early and heavy 2-day. Bénédictine, of course. I hope to recover and cook two pounds of my new secret recipe of burgers.