Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Steve Jobs is Lucifer!

There are on local TV some strange looking people who advertise themselves as psychics.

For a modest fee you contact them and they will tell you things about your future prospects or love life or whatever. 
They are quite harmless unless of course you are worried about fools being parted from their money but there are so many ways this happens every day that there is no point in worrying about people paying other people to tell them if they will find happiness. I could tell them for free but they would not believe me. 
More sinister are the bottom feeders who emerge from their burrows whenever a child goes missing. These people prey on the fears of the parents who will clutch at any straw to find a missing child. 
Two particularly unpleasant ones have emerged in Australia recently where a child named Kiesha has gone missing. These two charlatans say that they have ''seen'' and had ''contact'' with Kiesha and while they just can’t say where she is at the moment - they will keep on it until she turns up. 
The police always seem to listen to psychics - probably for the sake of the parents - and just go on doing what they have to do - which is normally to find which of the child’s relatives was responsible for its disappearance and he tells them where to find the body. 
There have of course been - and are now - some very famous psychics and delvers into the paranormal. All of them - by definition - charlatans.
One current one is John Edward who says he can contact the dead relatives of his studio audience. He puts on a marvelous show and the people in the audience  gasp in awe when they are spoken to from the grave by Auntie Maude or Grandma Kettle.
One of my favorite magazines - to which I subscribe - is Skeptic. This is an American publication which has many well respected scientists and skeptics as contributors and they explain lots of things - including precisely how John Edward does what he does so successfully - and indeed how psychics can get away with what they do. 
One of the most famous skeptics is James Randi and for many years his Educational Foundation has offered a $1 Million prize to anyone who can demonstrate ‘under proper observing conditions, evidence of any paranormal, supernatural, or occult power or event.’
Many have tried and all have failed - even though they are required only to do what they say they can do - and there is a list of applicants on the James Randi Education Foundation website. 
Naturally no one like John Edward or Uri Geller would ever attempt to claim this prize because their inevitable failure would be an embarrassment and a hindrance to their future efforts to suck money out of the gullible. 
Why did I start to write this? 

Oh - I know. Steve Jobs has this power over me and has mesmerized me with the ability of his iPad to transform my life and all that is in it. From a position of mild interest on its release I am now convinced that the is the coolest and most useful thing ever invented and I just have to have one - NOW. 
See what I mean about gullibility. 
Now when I get the iPad I will spend weeks convincing myself that it is just what I have always needed and that I could not live without it. I will even try to convince other people that they should have one. 
Steve Jobs is clearly just plain evil and has the power of Lucifer!

Of course one of the main reasons I want an iPad is that Cate was in the USA just after the release date and when she got back she told me that ‘all my colleagues were buying iPads and I nearly bought you one but I had spent too much on clothes’.

Oh nice one Cate. What a top excuse!
Now what I would have said is: ‘I nearly bought you an iPad but 
  1. they had run out, or
  2. the next generation will be better and I thought you would like that instead, or
  3. I was buying one when the salesman’s head exploded and they had to clear the store, or
  4. I did buy you an iPad but an escaped Lion tore it from my grasp and ran away with it.
Anything but the excuse she used.
Of course she now feels immensely guilty and wants me to buy one as quickly as possible as when she travels ‘everyone has one.’ 
It is quite delicious when your partner actually wants you to buy the latest gadget. 
Well - it has been released in Austria (in fact for weeks now) so I am about to toddle down to McSHARK in Mariahilferstrasse and get one. 
And no - McSHARK sells Apples not fish burgers. 
I love this website banner! Registered with the U.S. Government! Guaranteed authentic! LMAO!


  1. McShark has me in their fangs too!

    Three weeks ago, at my local SPAR, I watched a guy in flip-flops and ponytail pull out of his much-loved rucksack an ... i-Pad! Just checking his shopping list. How cool is that. *giggles* I was duly impressed of what can hide in the almost falling apart rucksack of a guy in well-worn clothes - "prewashed" designer??? - and flip-flops! (I shall have to memorize my shopping list from now on, lest I get caught with my list on .... yikes .... paper!!!)

    P.S.: My youngest's i-Pod and i-Phone got stolen the other night (yes, she worked and saved for it, infact, won't be able to afford either one for a long time to come - too many hours of babysitting involved).

  2. Badger you should be proud of the fact that your partner seeks the most stylish and fashionable clothes!

  3. Problem with that, Maalie, is that Badger doesn't get to see the clothes because Cate's away so much.

    If Badger had an iPad he would be reminded of her all the time :-)

  4. my boyfriend just bought one in vegas and i have to say... they are pretty damn cool!