Tuesday, September 9, 2008

The elusive internet

You know how wherever you go there is an Internet cafe in every corner? Not in Vienna - they are very few and far between. Even Starbucks doesn't have wireless Internet in all of their outlets.

Anyway - it is day 2 and Cate has been without an Internet connection for nearly 24 hours and is starting to shake, sweat and foam at the mouth. So we set out to find an Internet cafe. This is not easy but after a long trudge we find a cafe in Krugerstrasse that has free wireless. All you have to do to have this is drink a cup of ground mouse droppings and peer at the screen through a haze of smoke as the locals try desperately to kill themselves as quickly as possible.

There must be some incentive scheme for smokers to prompt so many people to do it so voraciously. Perhaps a Fly Buy scheme - for every million cigarettes you get a new lung?

For goodness sake they sell cigarettes from machines hanging on the walls in this town. I saw a bunch of machines in Landstrasse where you could buy chewing gum, condoms and cigarettes. Sort of a one stop shop really. Chew, fornicate and smoke - not necessarily in that order.

1 comment:

  1. Hello! Thanks for e-mailing the link. Am enjoying this v v much so far and will direct Lil Possum to read it ASAP. Mostly she's biddable. You are funny. I will make a print-out to read to Possum.