Pages

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Not quite as hairy

I am thinking about buying a new iPhone so spent some time yesterday trying to work out who has the best deal. As is intended by the providers – this is impossible – so I will just do a deal with AT&T.

I would rather get screwed by someone I know than by a complete stranger.

I am going to get one with a big screen – because I cannot now read anything on the small screen unless I am wearing glasses. This is frustrating because when I get important emails – like from Costco or Petco – I like to know immediately what the bargains are and how much I can save on dog food.  

This will not help me with the emails from the Czech Republic and these are increasing in number. I am now getting offers for white goods and cars. I know because they have pictures.

This morning there was a slight variation on the usual road catastrophes that befall the interstates in Indiana. Usually we just have cars and trucks crashing into each other at high speed. This morning we had a truck with a load of 40,000 pounds of mangos overturn. This completely buggered everything for some hours.

Incidentally the state government is suing the company that supplied the asphalt that is used on roads in Indiana. Apparently – instead of real asphalt – the suppliers have been using a mixture of granola, maple syrup and breadcrumbs. This is why the roads fall to bits as soon as they are laid.

The mango incident reminded me that when we lived in North Queensland we had a mango tree next to our pool. When the mangos were ripe the possums would sit in the tree above the pool and drop the seeds into the pool. This stuff was very effective in clogging up the pool pump.

But in Australia we have cute possums. Ours are sort of like Taylor Swift whereas in America opossums are most unattractive and are sort of like Donald Trump – but not quite as hairy.

5 comments:

  1. My possum never returned after he fell out of the tree and got a bloody nose.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Those two closing paragraphs... LMAO.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I would think that mangos are the logical neXt ingredient after granola, maple syrup and bread crumbs when trying to concoct the peRfect artificial faulty as-fault. 'Donald Trump as an opossum' is an insult to opossums eveRywhere.

    I hope you weren't a victim of the mall shooting today.

    ReplyDelete
  4. fmc: I think he gave up too easily. I am sure your tree was lovely.

    SK Waller: I am glad you liked them.

    esb: Yes I apologize to opossums.

    ReplyDelete