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Monday, April 26, 2010

Apparently it's President Obama's fault!


I am always intrigued by the stupidity of humanity in general but also by the breathtaking nuttiness of many groups and individuals.

Hojjat ol-eslam Kazem Sediqi – who is the “acting Friday prayer leader in Tehran” has stated that Women who wear revealing clothing and behave promiscuously are to blame for earthquakes.

"Many women who do not dress modestly lead young men astray and spread adultery in society which increases earthquakes" he explained.

My first question is – what is the ‘acting Friday prayer leader’ doing making statements like this? Is it not important enough for the ‘permanent Friday prayer leader’ to be involved. I really hope that Hojjat hasn’t overstepped his authority here and gone outside the guidelines.

He may believe what he said – and this does not give me any comfort at all. Although – he may have been cruising the Internet looking for pictures of camels in lingerie and stumbled across Lady Gaga’s latest video.

This would be enough to cause something of an earthquake in the loins of some men and he may have been taken by the moment and overreacted.

Not so long ago the Chief Imam (or whatever the leading Muslim in Australia is called) likened young non-Muslim Australian women – dressed as they normally dress – to ‘cat’s meat’ and said it was no wonder that they were raped by young Muslim men - because they provoked them beyond all reason.

It would all be so hilarious if these people were not serious and in positions of some authority in what must be the most repressive and misogynistic religion ever invented (and there is a awful lot of competition for that particular title)

Rush Limbaugh on the other hand thinks that the Icelandic Volcano eruption was caused by the healthcare reforms in America. Apparently it’s President Obama’s fault.

I think God needs some contemporary geography lessons. I know he made the world but that was a long time ago and things have moved about since then. I mean - why is he kicking the shit out of Europeans because of something President Obama did?

But - I just don’t agree with them. I think the volcano thing was God telling Austrians that he does not want them to smoke in restaurants anymore.

The problem is that these signs are too obscure. We need something more direct that we can link to our generally frightful actions on earth. I mean – earthquakes and volcano eruptions happen all the time and – while Rush may be right – I for one would like more proof.

Why don’t these people pray to God to ask him to do something more direct – you know like making Glenn Beck combust spontaneously on air at the same time sending a message saying ‘this is what happens to those people/infidels (tick one) who take my name in vain.’

I don’t pray to God any more. There were some tragic incidents early in my life that made me doubt the power of prayer.

In my first job I had a crush on a girl called Ann Hastings. She was a few years older that I was and I prayed to God for the courage to ask her out. God granted me that wish and when I did asked her out she laughed. LAUGHED!

I had forgotten to ask God to get her to actually go out with me. Sure it was my fault - but has he no imagination?

I must say that with God and me it has been downhill ever since that day.

Still – these days Ann – as I do – will look like a baked Alaskan Salmon. This is God's way of punishing her for refusing me and punishing me for praying for something so frivolous.

The good news is that my iMac has been built and is winging its way to me!

6 comments:

  1. Boobquake 2010. Support scientific inquiry:

    http://su.pr/1G7LIf

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow, I have missed reading this blog!! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou for being so...so... RAD!
    I know that word went out during the Reagan administration but it fits. You're rad.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Screaming Lord Sutch? You actually use that expression in Australia? I had no idea the fame of the Monster Raving Loony Party stretched that far beyond our borders!

    ReplyDelete
  4. xbxmas; thanks – I missed that – but please post pics of you making your contribution (no flags!).
    Katie: I used to be Rad – now I think I am just a bit strange.
    Parsifal: I am probably the only Australian ever to use that phrase as an exclamation. I just happen to be a fan of the MRLP.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Fuck me boots. Honestly, where have you been living?! Ah. Vienna.

    http://bestuff.com/stuff/come-fuck-me-boots

    But really, don't be silly. I don't do the vacuuming in those. I prefer these.

    http://www.pleaserusa.com/ProductDetail.asp?div=3_DEVIOUS&dpt=10_SS&ctg=&STYLE_CD=BALLET-20&PROD_CD=BAL20%2FB%2FLE

    Well, you asked.

    :D

    ReplyDelete
  6. Babel?
    In need of translation. ;-)

    ReplyDelete