I am in the process if trying to get fit and lose weight. To do this I have joined the YMCA gym downtown and have a personal trainer. I go three days a week and he works me very hard indeed. Today I had a very hard workout and was quite pleased at the end of it.
His name is Kevin so he really should be Australian. But he is a nice man and is probably religious and may be even a (shriek) Republican so I sort of nibble around the edges of politics. But he has gay friends so that is a good sign.
I rowed and pushed and pulled and huffed and puffed for a solid hour and was buggered at the end of it. (Buggered in the Aussie sense i.e. very tired - not molested).
I thought to myself that I must be losing weight by now and weighed myself when I got home. I have gained four pounds.
So perhaps my fat is turning into muscle. This does not seem likely when I look in the mirror - but who knows.
And surely there must be a time in life when people should not have to look at themselves in full length mirrors.
Honestly this does no good at all. When people get to my age they should come and take the mirrors away. They will say - hey - you look like a diseased walrus covered in barnacles - and everybody sees this when you go out - but there is no need for you to see this horrifying sight every time you go to the bathroom.
So we have replaced your mirror with a full size picture of a naked Donald Trump. This will certainly make you feel better about yourself. You will think every day ‘well I just must look better than that’. And you probably do.
After the gym today I shoveled snow. I love shoveling snow. It is very therapeutic and I think about lots of good things while I am doing it. It was a crystal clear day and very cold and it was just marvelous. Nothing could be heard except the sounds of our two insane dogs chasing each other and growling and yelping.
The new presidency it so much better than I had anticipated. I expected some amount of amusement - punctuated by bouts off dismay - but fuck me swinging sideways it is a complete catastrophe.
I think the current presidency was designed by the Italians. They have turned roadside dining into an experience so surreal that people do it just to be there and say they did it. We traveled in Italy a lot and could not wait to get to the diners.
It is like a vortex.
Imagine a room absolutely stuffed full of hungry people. They all want to eat - and food abounds. But to get it you have to:
Fight your way to the food counter to see what you would like to buy:
Then fight your way to the other side of the room to the cashier to place your order. (remembering precisely what you want).
Pay for your food and fight your way back to the food counter - clutching your receipt - to buy your food.
It is a whirling shrieking mass of throbbing and sweating humanity and sometimes people get spun off the edges and end up in the car park sobbing their hungry hearts out. Are they strong enough to try again?
That is this administration.
It is not a circus. A circus is organized. This is a total mess of uncoordinated rubbish perpetrated by ideologues and fools who have no idea what they are doing and have no idea how it should be done.
I think we can say with confidence that what is happening now is going to fuck America for a very long time.
We will not be here then - but good luck to you all.
An old gypsy lady lives in a caravan on the edge of a nearby village. She can predict events that are soon to occur. Naturally, I asked her to tell me what was likely to happen to President Trump. She groaned : “You say ‘likely to happen’. What a silly man you are. My gypsy wisdom is composed, not of likelihoods, but certainties. So, I can inform you with not the least doubt that your leader will not be standing upright for a long time.” Those were her words, but she refused to explain what exactly they mean. When I insisted upon her giving me more precise information, she simply repeated those same mysterious words : Your leader will not be standing upright for a long time. I wonder what she meant. Was she saying that President Trump is going to spend more and more time seated on his presidential chair? Or moving around in circles? Or standing on his head? That’s the problem with calling upon an old gypsy. You’re never quite sure of what she’s saying…
ReplyDeleteThe gypsy lady (who doesn’t really speak Engish very well, but makes a courageous attempt) phoned me up to tell me she had been confused by the verb ‘restitute’, which means rebuilding ancient temples that were knocked down by Islamic idiots. Did she have the impression that Trump had stood aside while certain US glories were being knocked down? On closer inspection, I’m wondering whether her vision of the future was based, not upon ‘restitution’, but rather the nearby theme of DESTITUTION. That sounds better, more civilized, than terrorist bullets.
ReplyDeleteI have some confidence in your gypsy lady. I think from where she is she has a good grasp of what is going on. Her messages are too obscure for me to interpret - but then I am not a gypsy - but I think she is on the right track. I am certainly confident that Trump will not complete his term.
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